This Day

“You know what day it is?”


“Thursday, actually. But no, the date.”

“I don’t know the day of the week and you think I know the date?”

“They’re not the same thing.”

“I don’t know. It’s October, right?”


“So. Thursday in October.”

“Think about it.”

“I don’t know how to think about it.”

“What day is it?”

“You already asked me. I don’t know.”

“You’re kidding.”

“I’m not. I thought it was Tuesday.”

“It’s Thursday.”

“Okay, it’s Thursday. What’s so important about Thursday?”

“It’s not Thursday that’s important. It’s this Thursday.”

“Today, you mean?”

“Yes. What else could I mean?”

“Some people say ‘This Thursday’ and they mean next Thursday.”

“I mean this Thursday. Today Thursday.”

“Okay, what’s so important about this Thursday?”

“You really don’t know?”

“Ask me that again and today will be the day I murder you.”

“I can’t believe you don’t know what day it is.”

“I can’t believe how disinterested I’ve become in this conversation.”

“You really don’t know what day it is.”

“I really don’t.”

“And thinking about it, knowing it’s October, you can’t think of any special days in October?”

“It’s not Halloween already, is it?”

“No, it’s not Halloween.”

“John Lennon’s birthday?”

“That was last week.”

“Indigenous People’s Day?”

“Now you’re just messing with me.”

“I’m not messing with you.”

“You’re serious.”

“I’m serious.”

“Come on. Think about about it. Think!”

“I am thinking about it. Not a lot of special days in October.”

“Surely you can think of one more.”

“Don’t call me Shirley.”

“I knew you were going to say that.”

“And I knew you were going to do this.”